My name is Nikki (well really my name is Nicole, but merr I prefer Nikki). This is my first post here, and well, I'm not totally certain what to write today... I set this blog up because, I have crazy thoughts that swarm my mind all the time, and I need somewhere to let them loose I suppose...so here I am. I'm not really expecting anyone to be reading along, but if I get some readers that would be pretty rad :)
Sometimes I just ramble on about random nothings, but that's me I guess. I don't know what I'm looking for in life, all I know is that I want to live my life the most interesting and fulfilling way possible... Just so you all know (if there is anyone reading this) I am not always the most grammatically correct, although I will try! So please don't criticize...What am I saying? Pfft, if you want to judge, so be it, I'm not gonna tell you what to do...
I guess I'll tell you right off the bat about my parental unit, cause they have affected me in a major way. I was born and raised a Jehovah's Witness, and at age 17 I finally moved out to begin living my life the way I believe it should be. I am now 18 and have been living outside of my parents' clutch for just over a year. I have four parents, and yes, all FOUR of them are JW's... so I never got a break from the religious restrictions and all the drama. For the longest time I played their little game, pretending to be a good little 'righteous' follower of their faith, but in high school I finally made the decision of trying to break free. So I hid many things from them. I would leave my house in the morning looking nice, modest, and just perfectly presentable for my parents, but then when I got to school I would have a different outfit that I changed into. They wouldn't let me be who I wanted to be. I'm not saying the clothes I changed into were like overly revealing, or of some sort of gang...its just, my parents wanted me to be a complete 'plain jane' because I wasn't suppose to look like everyone else, I had to stand out and be 'pure'. They took this to extreme measures..it got to the point I had to hide some of my favourite nail polishes from them because yellow nail polish is 'too wild' and nail polish that is too dark is 'goth'. Like what the hell!? They were extremists in that sense and I resented them for it. I'm not saying all Jehovah Witnesses are like this, but I'm saying that I had to hide who I really was.
I had my first birthday this year! Can you imagine? And my first Christmas...and yea, that's just kinda insane! Anyway, I'm just so glad I have done what I have and I can be true to myself. I no longer have to hide behind a false shell... I feel renewed and enlightened! I can't wait to discover life, there's so many things I haven't had the opportunity to do, and now here I am, just waiting for more things to hit me like a crashing wave of choices, paths, and experiences. I am so excited! Look at me, I sound like it's my first day out of the old house, but like I said before, it's been just over a year (14 months to be more accurate). Anyway, that's that lol...
I have a real passion for music. I know most people do though, but I don't know, I feel like I would honestly die without music; i eat it up. I will listen to anything under the sun, I am honestly very open in that sense. I have a fascination with things that are different. Unique, odd, kooky... don't know what word to use, but if it seems really strange I would probably like it. I don't know if I voiced that out quite properly, but oh well... So I think I have rambled on enough for tonight... I might have gotten a bit carried away, but hey, that's ok, I don't really expect many to read lol. If you find me intriguing, or even if you think I'm just ridiculous, add me to msn or facebook, I would love to chat.
Thank you muchly! xoxox
. : Never mind me, I'm just a drifting soul : .
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